I’m not gonna sit here and preach to you about anything regarding life or stuttering or make comparisons to myself. I highly recommend you reach out and get involved with Friends, The Stuttering Association for the Young, or The National Stuttering Association. All of them host events nice social mixers for people who stutter. It’ll be a space where you’ll be able to take however long you need to finish speaking and the weight of embarrassment or frustration will be gone for the first time. With that said, I’m not trying to say getting involved with a stuttering organization will fix anything. I do however, think it could be a huge stepping stone to self love. Everyone deals with their own shit and I believe your thoughts of suicide are much more common than people say. But the only way to get through it is to start small and find love for yourself.