postr/StutterJanuary 8, 2015

Insulted for stuttering during an interview

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Content

Insulted for stuttering during an interview I'm a medical student applying for radiology residency. Yesterday, an interviewer interrupted me while speaking and asked if I "normally stuttered." I get offended (perhaps unjustifiably?) at this question alone, since it's pretty obvious I have a stutter, and bringing it up just embarrasses me more. The job I'm applying for requires the use of speech recognition software, so he said "it's going to be interesting when you have to use the software." It seemed to me like he thought I wouldn't be able to do my job. Now I know I won't have much of a problem with this, since it's always easier to speak when I'm alone rather than in conversation, and I essentially told him so. He responded with, "Oh, so you have difficulty with conversation? That's perfect, I can do all the talking and you can listen." This is the second time an interviewer has mocked my stuttering (in addition to the many times I've been made fun of in social settings), and I'm at an all-time low. I think I'll get passed over for jobs because of my stuttering. I attribute my introverted personality and my failure to form many friendships and relationships to my stuttering. I lack the motivation to do even non-social tasks because my stuttering depresses my mood so much. If there's one thing I could change about myself, without a doubt it would be to stop stuttering. It's closed off an entire world to me. I can't imagine how nice it must be to just go up to people and talk to them fluently without fear of embarrassment! To not have to worry about if someone thought less of you because of your stuttering after you spoke with them! Right now I just can't get over how much stuttering has held me back in life.

Themes

Identity & DisabilitySchool & WorkEmotional Experience

Subthemes

Stigma & BullyingEmployment & CareerShame & EmbarrassmentAnxiety & Social JudgmentHelplessness & Agency