I think it's good you've come here for support. If you talk to enough people here online, they'll tell you about many other techniques and strategies we've used to cope. Suicide is definitely not the answer. My parents are Pakistani, and when I came back from my first National Stuttering Association conference, they asked if they taught me any new techniques ... not quite the point. You should get to some of the conferences. I don't mean to make light of it, but you may actually find someone who stutters a lot more than you. And you can find out what they do to cope. Being surrounded by people who stutter definitely puts it into perspective.