postr/StutterDecember 6, 2013

I would like to vent my feelings.

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Content

I would like to vent my feelings. I have been stuttering since the age of 4 and i am now 15. I am absolutely sick of stuttering. It holds be back from everything. I get so nervous just standing in line at a fast food restaurant or in the line at a grocery store because i just don't want to say anything. I don't want people to judge me. I hate when people finish my words and look at my blankly waiting for me to continue. A few days ago, while i was with my girlfriend (who is super supportive of me and is the least judgemental person i have ever met) i was getting something at a shop and the lady serving me kept asking me questions and i was struggling to reply. After i had bought what i wanted i walked out of the shop in tears. My parents tried getting me speech therapy but it was just too expensive. They yell at me when i stutter, they think that will somehow help. Once, when i was in grade 6, my mum threatened to take away my laptop if i keep stuttering. No one understands how hard it is to control. No one understands how much it affects me mentally. I am so jealous of everyone who speaks normally and effortlessly. It's such a task to open my mouth and let words come out. Thank you for reading this stupid little rant. Any helpful ideas to help control my stutter would be appreciated.

Themes

Emotional ExperienceIdentity & DisabilityCommunity & Support

Subthemes

Shame & EmbarrassmentStigma & BullyingFrustration & AngerAdvice RequestsHelplessness & Agency