I’m so sorry you went through this. I know exactly what you mean, occasionally stuttering is absolutely not the same as a chronic stutter and I also hate it when people say this. I have autism and honestly I don’t even like saying that anymore because so many people self-diagnose with ASD that it’s just frustrating. I was diagnosed at 3yo and went through years and years of therapy to be mildly functional, yet I can’t live alone and do most things like others. I absolutely hate it. I know how you feel and I am so sorry you tried taking your life. Sending you hugs.