commentr/StutterJanuary 19, 2020

Content

I don't think swimming is like stuttering. In fact, I don't think we should compare stuttering to any old activity we want to improve in. It's not an activity or skill we're talking about here. It's the condition or disability or handicap of stuttering. You're free to think about it however you wish, of course, but my worry is that the ways we think can add to the struggle of the situation. I'd rather look at ways to think that makes it easier on us to be in the situation (and not by shying away from reality). It's not wise to think in terms of fluency. That's not what we're here for. We're here to manage our stutter. A singular focus on fluency clashes with the fact that it's not an expected thing for a stutterer. Perhaps you are in reality interested in a _cure_. I believe this to be counterproductive thinking, since it's an unrealistic expectation. Lots of stutterers - if you browse this subreddit, for instance - have this idea that what's "inside" is the perfect thing they want to say, and what comes out is far from. That's a difficult contrast to live with. It's in this context i mention perfection, because it's not of practical use to us. If you want to place it in another context, that's fine, but my point stands. - *However...* I will rather strongly disagree with you that we're _causing_ ourselves to be less fluent in the way you describe. It's not our fault. It's not something we're doing. We are stutterers, and we can figure out how to manage it. But claiming that we're doing it to ourselves - _that's_ negative thinking. We don't want that. - If you feel put in a box by describing yourself as a stutterer, sure, that's a reaction to the fact of it all. It doesn't have to be that way, though. It also doesn't have to be a pessimistic thing. If we talk more straightforwardly about it, it won't feel as bad (as some feel it). Stutter isn't cancer. Stutter is a likelihood of making odd sounds now and then, and some people have that. Other people have other things. Stutterers should not expect - and neither be expected to - perform in ways that are impossibly perfect. Nobody should, to be honest.

Themes

Anticipation & AvoidanceCauses & VariabilityIdentity & DisabilityTherapy & Professional

Subthemes

Avoidance & SubstitutionSeverity & FluctuationAuthenticity vs. MaskingIdentity & Self-PerceptionAcceptance & PrideCure Claims / Alt-Treats