OP I understand on what you are going through. I am still frustrated as you are. What I have been told by SLP’s and medical professionals with whom are experts in the field of stuttering, it comes down to two things. One is the mapping of the brain has not been fully mapped out as with the other parts of the body. The second is the pharmaceutical industry. There are roughly 2 to 3% of the world’s population that stutters. Sadly, the pharmaceutical industry companies does not see a return on investment for the amount of money that goes into a drug for a very small number of people. In the past there have been trials of a few drugs for stuttering. Sadly, those drugs never made it to market. If you want the latest information on the research that is going on with finding a cure for stuttering OP, then may I direct you to The National Stuttering Association’s website’s, https://westutterg.org There you will find what is going on with the research. OP, I would suggest look into attending a local or a virtual chapter for support. They are free to attend. When you are at the Home Screen there is a search box at the top left. In the search box type: Research. You will see the results with everything about finding a cure for stuttering. Keep in mind that there is no cure yet for stuttering. To find a NSA Chapter in your area, type in the search box: Find A NSA Chapter Near You. There are also virtual chapters as well. I would like to say OP, that if you decide to attend a in person Chapter or a virtual chapter that some “First Timers” would attend and watch what goes on. You are not being forced / pressured to participate. If you are practicing a type of fluency method(s), your more that happy to do it at the chapter meetings. OP, I wish you well with stuttering. I know you are on a low with your stuttering. Please use this Reddit group as your sounding board to express your feelings you are having with your stuttering. We here all had similar thoughts, feelings, and experiences you are having. In the long run OP, you will have more good days then bad days.