It's a whole story behind it actually. My dad is in general someone with a very long attention span he always likes to lead the conversation so he's not really a good listener because if it doesn't interests him he just cuts off your sentence. (Also with fluent people) So that way i can't have a conversation with him. And we already discussed it very often that its rude to do that but he never really changed. And it sounds weird but... he doesn't know that i stutter. My life long story short: i went to a stutter therapy when i was 11 years old believing i could completely cure it, but i relapsed. But my father was always proud of me because he believed i was cured. And since that day i pretended to be cured from my stutter because i didn't want to see him disappointed in me hoping my stutter would vanish with getting older (wich it didn't) So since that day i pretended to just be a "quiet kid" to make him believe I'm fluent. I feel like im a disappointment to my dad because of that relapse and especially for lying to him all my life. Its sad to know what great friendship we could've had but instead you see all those precious years flying by before your eyes. So at some point it starts to feel desperate, im turning 20 tomorrow and with age it's still hard to figure out the decision i have to make for what's best for our relationship