I think your case boils down to Giving too much of importance to the "Way you Speak". I have been stuttering from last 26 years. But until recently my daughter started to stutter and I was devastated. I took my stutter very seriously and did a thorough study on the topic for 4 moths. What I came up with a PATTERN that most people who stutters follow. I then devised a technique to attack the PATTERN and got amazing results. I have compiled my Findings in an app https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.kaushikbaruah.stutter&hl=en I sincerely believe it would help you too.