Take it easy. Relax. You don't helping yourself its whole overthinking and blaming. Try to accept your stuttering. You may never get rid of it, that's okay. And it's not fatal. Stuttering is mostly caused by avoiding stuttering. Allow yourself to stutter. I used to be afraid to speak with children, bc they copy what they hear. But whole last year I taught them how to solving rubick's cubes, so it became less vulnerable for me. That "More practice - more fluent" works for me