OP, are you located in the United States? If you are there is a national non profit organisation called, The National Stuttering Association or NSA (https://westutter.org). The NSA has stuttering support chapters all over the country and some virtual chapters as well. I attend my local monthly chapter meeting. The cost is 100% free. The people at these chapter meetings are awesome. I see them as my second family. At the chapter meetings you are not forced to participate, a lot of first time stutters who attend just sit and watch what goes on. When they feel they want to take part they do it on their own time. It is a great way to practice any fluency technique or techniques. You will not be interrupted when you are blocking. What I love about attending the chapter meetings is there is absolutely no judgment whatsoever about you. We all have experience the almost identical situations you have experienced. It’s a great way to bounce ideas off each other. OP, my stuttering is extremely severe, and just like yourself as debilitating as well. Both mentally, physically, and emotionally. When you’re on the website go to the search bar and type in the word CHAPTERS. Then you will see a link, NAA Chapter Locator. Click on it and follow the on screen instructions. Good luck OP!