I find it EXTREMELY difficult to gain respect and be assertive. I don't feel like a "man".

I find it EXTREMELY difficult to gain respect and be assertive. I don't feel like a "man". I'd like to believe I'm a well dressed and well presented person. I keep clean and put effort into how I appear physically.   Personality wise, I think I'm relatively warm, I listen to everyone, and I do well in one-on-one conversations.   But in group conversations/parties I always feel like the least important person in the room. Everyone talks rapidly sharing their stories, and there's this kinda "momentum" that's present, and whenever I talk I feel like I'm ruining that momentum. A lot of the times I would talk and people wouldn't respond, or straight up ignore what I said, and it sucks so much. In moments like that I really doubt myself and question whether or not I'd ever become a confident and well-liked personality.   I really just want to be a chill person that doesn't seem like I'm trying too hard. I want to be the guy that people approach, not the guy that is always approaching everybody, or always initiating. I laugh/giggle a lot and I'm always smiley and I want to cut that down by a lot, cause I feel like it makes people not take me seriously. I'm trying to cut cut down on making jokes as well.   Has any of you felt similar? What did you do that helped?