commentr/StutterSeptember 5, 2019

Content

Many people don't even stutter when talking to kids, and interviews are literally the Kryptonite for most PWS. But lest just say her interview is an accurate representation of her speech: I like to divide things in to pros and cons when making decision. Lets have a go; Cons: 1. There is an emergency and she cant talk clearly on the phone or when upset 2. Your older son might give her a really hard time 3. She may be socially ostracized from the other nannies, she is also a foreigner and English is not her first language. Your wife concerns are valid. But here are some pros: 1. Your impatient son may just yet learn patience. If he loves and respects her, which children grow to do, he will learn what is acceptable and what is not and she will be able to be very patient with him and teach him something about patience. 2. English is not her first language and she may be far more fluent in her mother tongue. If she is, you could encourage her to talk to your children in her language and they would be bilingual at a really young age. All the better if the language is Mandarin or Spanish. 3. I might get flack for this, but women (and some men), especially in the caring professions, are actually very accepting of people who are different. Most of the nannies will respect her and even perhaps coddle her a bit making her transition way easier. one may even have a charge who stutters and needs advice on how to deal with it. 4. All your children will learn how to respect and treat someone who is different. They will learn patience and kindness. They will learn to bond with other people and they will learn about another culture. Its nice to have kids who are smart, its even better to have kids who are kind and accepting. Please don't turn her down because she stutters, stuttering is manageable and the opportunity to work a fulfilling job with a kind and accepting boss does wonders for self esteem which in turn may do wonders for her speech. The money she is paid may even go to speech therapy that will help her be more in control of her speech and open up new opportunities. By giving her a job, you are helping your family and your children, but you are also helping another human reach their potential. Do not NOT hire her for something that she cannot help at this time, but also does not interfere with her ability to do a great job helping you raise your children. But definitely ensure that both you and your wife are 100% on board with having her as a part of your family for real. Because if your wife has doubts, she may yet prove her very wrong, but when it comes to trusting someone with your kids, its almost ok to be a bit irrational which can be traumatic for everyone- especially the kids. You asked, "should I ask her about her speech?" I only elicit information if its actionable. Really ask yourself what you want to hear, and what you will do with the information you get. Importantly, kids don't stutter because they mimic people or learn. It's not a habit, it's a neurological problem and its not contagious. Know this now, if your child starts to stutter, it's not because of her. Most people who stutter have never even met someone else who stutters. You should be far more worried about her attitudes to food and exercise and its effects on your children, than her speech. Finally, I think you are really good person and I want to thank you for reaching out and asking for advice, I hope I have helped you in some way. I also think that your children are very lucky to have a dad who is accepting and open to people who may be a wee bit different. I wish more people were like you.

Themes

Social & RelationshipsParent & Caregiver

Subthemes

Audience Scale & Group SizeFamily Support & ConflictTreatment Decisions