I certainly know how you feel. I am a lifelong stutterer as well as a speech pathologist. Communication is everything in my field. I was able to get through the days one day at a time. I always felt ashamed and embarrassed everyday and would avoid public speaking. I also had a significant learning disability which also reduced my self esteem. School only made me feel stupid until I realized that it was not me but rather the way my brain was wired. I realized that I had a stuttering brain which caused me to stutter. My research brought me to the conclusion that my stuttering was due to poor and intermittent airflow resulting in my stuttering. I found the answer in the Valsalva response. Once I was able to voluntarily maintain my airflow I no longer stuttered. Over time and a lot of practice I trained my brain to become a fluent brain. I don’t stutter anymore. I found that stuttering can be “cured”. Everyone will most likely have a different experience. I was lucky in the sense that I am a speech pathologist where I had a greater expertise in how the brain learns. I used that knowledge to help me to become fluent.