Maybe your SO will want to speak for herself. I've never once had the worry 'what if I can't verbally defend my husband?' My husband can speak for himself, so why would I. Speaking up for yourself is a much more realistic challenge to face in life. But learning how to peacefully de-escalate situations and avoid pointless conflict is a much more admirable trait than some guy who can puff up his chest and fluently talk shit, lol.