I understand your frustration. I’ve been so suicidal for years that I actually almost followed through last weekend. But, I ended up telling loved ones and just saw a therapist for the first time in a while today. I’m not going to give you some BS about “it gets better.” I understand your pain. What I will say, is that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Many stutterers feel your pain. I have a suspicion that you don’t actually want to die, but don’t want to deal with this pain anymore. You just have to make the decision for yourself, if being alive is worth it. All the things you’ve yet to do. The ppl you haven’t met. On and on…is it worth it? Deep down inside, I know it is. That’s why I didn’t kill myself when I had the opportunity.