postr/StutterJanuary 7, 2015

Speaking fluently at medical school interviews. Weird situation!

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Content

Speaking fluently at medical school interviews. Weird situation! A little about me. I'm in my late 20s. I have always had a stutter as a child. It went away in high school when I had lots of friends and was very happy with life. Friends didn't even notice I had any problems. I used to speak in front of a 100 people, present at conferences, speak on the mic. because I was very involved in community service. --------------------------- Then I went to college and the constant change of environment as well as unhappiness with academic/personal life brought it back. Meeting old friends often said "I didn't know you stuttered" or "I thought you got over it!". ------------------ I'm applying to medical school next year. I am not short on confidence regarding my ability to become a good doctor, I am just nervous about the interview process. I think it stems from caring about the impression I make on them because everyone applying has very competitive applications and any little hesitation/doubts from the interviewer (i.e. stuttering), they can easily save themselves the trouble and pick someone who doesn't stutter. Its ruthless. ----------------------- Even today, I notice that when I am speaking with friends, I do NOT stutter at all. I don't stutter when I am singing nor when I am reciting sentences that I previously stuttered during the day. ------------------------------- So, I basically do not stutter once I am comfortable with the person I am speaking to. It's an almost impossible thought to be comfortable with a medical school interviewer that you just met and who plans to ask you about your deepest fears/downfalls in life. ---------------------- My recent coping mechanism was to quickly finish speaking while holding my breath (quite counterproductive I know), or using avoidances (I didn't even know there was a name for this). -------------------------------- It's so odd that the words I struggle with when speaking to a certain person, come so fluently when I am alone. WHAT AM I EVEN AFRAID OF? They go away when I'm drinking, or when I'm out with friends and excited about the fun night ahead. ----------------------- My plan is to exercise, find ways to relax more often, and actively try to speak slower in everyday interactions. I do believe this is psychological as my problem goes away when I establish a comfort level (maybe I am afraid of what people think of me). I don't believe I have a severe stutter. I just think I need to work on being happy again and working on accepting myself regardless of the minor academic mistakes I may have made earlier on (the cause of my insecurities). ---------------------- Anyways, I wanted to know what you guys think about my situation? Any tips?

Themes

Emotional ExperienceCauses & VariabilityCoping & AdvocacyIdentity & Disability

Subthemes

Anxiety & Social JudgmentStress & Fight/FlightFluency TechniquesAcceptance & PrideHope & Motivation