Right there with you, fuck everything at this point. Hey, for the past several months I have just flat out stopped trying. If I am alone and dont have anyone to speak for me, I just bring a piece of paper around with me and write everything down. If someone asks me a question, just hold up a finger signaling them to hold on a second, then write what you want down. Sure, it is EXTREMELY awkward and cringey at first, but you get used to it. The way I think of it is, I am limited by my talking...it holds me back in every aspect of life. Why cant the solution just be to throw talking out the damn window. People tell me speech therapy helps, some supplements help, and so on and so on...I have tried everything at this point. Nothing fucking helps, it seems it is the same for you. Just be aware that the whole not talking thing can lead to an extremely lonely life. But I actually quite like being along(I guess my stuttering has done that over the years). I have a couple friends I hang out with maybe once or twice a month, but thats it. You dont have to have breakdowns anymore, I know the feeling of having them. Over the last couple days I have come into a situation where I have to go get a job. I have recently decided that I am just going to go into an interview and not say a damn word. Literally everything will be written down. Good thing to know is that there are other situations that this is called for as well. How do deaf people communicate when the listener doesnt know sign language or there isn't an interpreter, they just write everything down. This is just my solution, maybe it can help you too. I was in speech therapy for 9 years...there isnt any help for me