postr/StutterDecember 28, 2025

I need advice

10 points6 commentsView on Reddit →

Content

I need advice Since birth, I haven't spoken normally. Initially, I had a speech delay, which developed into a stutter. I've always been alone and haven't trusted anyone because I learned from a young age that even if I made a friend, the first problem would remind me that I couldn't speak like other people. Even my family and siblings were like that. I spent my entire school life alone, hoping that I would somehow improve when I grew up. Of course, being alone all my life led to severe depression, social anxiety, panic attacks, and other problems. I was always a dreamer and hopeful that the future would be better, but now I'm not. I remember on my first day at university, when I had to introduce myself, I heard the other students laughing and whispering. After that, I dropped out. I tried to go back four times, and each time I ran away after receiving my acceptance letter. I feel like my life is over. I'm 23 years old now. Even when I tried to learn on my own and worked harder than everyone else, managing to work as a software developer at a quantum security company, I couldn't last more than six months. I wasn't fired, but I'm the one who ran away. I couldn't accept the fact that I couldn't participate in any meetings and that no one could understand me when I spoke to them. I felt like a dwarf no matter how hard I tried, even if I was better than others, I'd still be less than them. I think about suicide every day; I can't take it anymore.

Themes

Emotional ExperienceCauses & VariabilityIdentity & DisabilitySchool & Work

Subthemes

Helplessness & AgencyAnxiety & Social JudgmentTrauma & PsychologicalSuicidal Ideation & High DistressStigma & BullyingEmployment & Career

Codes (1)

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