Hey mate! I feel you, and I know how hard it is.. but sometimes it has everything to do with how we see ourselves, and not how others sees us. As a stutter, I always think that people avoid me or leave me out for it.. I always thought that I bother them when I take time to talk.. but TURNS OUT THAT NOBODY GIVES A DAMN except ME. If your “friends” or the people you are surrounding are making you feel that way, then they are not your people. Have you tried being honest with them? Or asking them to be patient cause you want to share something? I have tons of friend, they all know I stutter... they all wait for me to talk, never make face expressions, or stare. I had moments where I’d get sick of myself and say never-mind and then they would insist that I’d talk cause they want to listen.