I understand your viewpoint, I have faced that dilemma time and time again. I am 54, like you, have had those awkward pauses, had problems so bad that everyone just doesn't understand what it is really like to be unable to say what we want to say. The problem with letting others talk for you, is that you are giving your stuttering more power, making it stronger, and that is what it wants. If you start doing that, letting others speak for you, the next time you find yourself in that situation, it will be even harder to speak. Stuttering is like a bully, the more you give in to it, the more it will want in the future. You have to keep yourself off balance, keep pushing yourself, keep your stuttering unhappy. If that means you take a minute or so to say your name, then take that minute. Believe it or not, your friends already know you stutter, so go ahead and do it. Also, it sounds like you have good friends. Take time and talk to them, I mean have a real heart to heart with them. Tell them what it is like, tell them that the "take a deep breath" and "take your time" only adds to the stress, and makes it worse. Tell them you understand they are trying to help, but patience is the best thing they can do for you. I have had those talks with my friends, and once they started letting me finish, sit there quietly and patiently listen to me, it does get easier, but it takes work.