I can't agree with you more on "doesn't let me be happy". I am not really depressed or suicidal, but deep down I am not happy with myself and in some way with God (sorry for the religious reference though). I know for a fact if I didn't stutter or stutter so bad like I do, I would be a different person. I would be more outgoing and I will definitely never shut up! lol. People that can talk fluently take their voice for granted, they talk like it is nothing to it. I just want to join a conversation, and not just give short feedback. I want to start a conversation, even with strangers. I want to order my own food, I want to answer the phone, I just want to speak like a normal human being. But yeah....fuck it!