postr/StutterMarch 2, 2014

On Wednesday night I have to make a presentation to a board of 5 "community members" for my high school graduation project, and I'm freaking out over it.

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Content

On Wednesday night I have to make a presentation to a board of 5 "community members" for my high school graduation project, and I'm freaking out over it. Hi. I've been stuttering my whole life. I've tried everything from speech therapy with my dad, who also stutters, to that speech easy hearing aid thing (which helped to a degree, but by no means "cured" me), and if anything, it's only gotten worse as time has gone on. I have a great social life, though my girlfriend situation could be a bit better, but overall I think I've coped pretty well with it and I'm pretty happy with how I turned out. That being said, I really hate, like, I guess, *projecting*. It doesn't matter if I'm telling my friends a story at lunch or recording a podcast for school... when I have "the floor" my stutter gets really, really bad. And on Wednesday, I'm going to have the floor for 15 minutes. The panel of community members who will grade me will know about my speech impediment and they'll, according to my English teacher, "be patient", but Jesus Christ, I'm just so scared about that presentation. I'm being graded, in part, on eye contact and posture, two things I know I will mess up with when I get stuck on a word. I'm also really scared of them judging me not only for a grade, but as a person. I know that's stupid, because all of my friends have been able to see past my speech impediment, but still, I'm just so worried about them labeling me as this pathetic stuttering freak. I have no idea what to do, and I'm really scared. Any tips?

Themes

Anticipation & AvoidanceEmotional ExperienceSpeech & Stuttering

Subthemes

Anticipating StutteringFeared Words & NamesOverthinking & MonitoringAnxiety & Social JudgmentPhysical Tension

Codes (2)

public_speakingperceived_judgment