I agree that it's when we try not to stutter that we do... but I appreciate to some extent your refusal of the label. Personally I've transitioned to "I *have* challenges speaking sometimes" rather than "I *am* a stutterer". My speech impediment, through about 14 years of speech therapy and hard work, has become less about identity and more about execution, if that makes any sense. It's something I *do*, not something I *am*. I don't allow it to define me nor do I require it for my own self-definition. I don't feel like looking at it like that diminishes the problem for me; rather, it allows me a sense of objectivity and thoughtfulness about it that I'm not sure I would have otherwise. For what it's worth—as far as identity vs. characteristic, without exception, those people who have commented on my stutter have said **"I don't care that you stutter"**, and not **"I don't care that you're a stutterer"**. If other people don't incorporate my speech problems into my identity, why should I do it to myself? Again, I appreciate the value to some people of wanting to embrace stuttering into their identity. I get that accepting it and getting comfortable with it is important—not disputing that point. Just saying that facing the world with it can happen in several ways, and it's crucial to all of us to be able to do that 1) on our own terms and 2) in a healthy & loving way. Whatever works for you, etc.