I’m sorry, from one stutterer to another, I know it’s not easy…but sitting down and having a pity party is never the answer. I’m proud that you are looking for answers and trying to get better. I can tell you that in my 20’s (currently 44) I stuttered pretty bad. I was an active duty Marine at the time. I can tell you that you don’t really know ridicule until you’re with a group of males where everyone feels alpha and you have a “weakness” on full display. lol But you have to remember: Stuttering is one small part of who you are. You cannot let this one thing stop you from living the life you deserve. Do you know why YOU stutter and not the asshole kid who makes fun of you? Because YOU are the one strong enough and smart enough to handle it. Here are some things/tips/approaches I have taken over the years to help with my stuttering. I’m at a point where I lead meetings daily, quickly jump on calls, offer advice or help at the drop at a dime. Most people don’t even know I stutter. 1. Everyone stutters to one magnitude or another. Early on I would beat myself up because I had this unrealistic expectation of having perfect speech. Accept the fact that sometimes you won’t be flawless, and some days will be better than others. But this is true for everyone. 2. You have to work on the mental side of things. For me, I found that most of my stuttering was due to anxiety…much like you, fear of being ridiculed. That anxiety would cause me to stutter more than my actual stuttering, if that makes sense. Look into CBT. It will help you deal with the anxiety, which will likely decrease your stuttering. Listen to affirmations about speaking well and public speaking. These helped me immensely!! I knew from being in the Marines that being “brainwashed” is a very real thing. You can 100 percent, absolutely change the way you think about your speech. For me, changing my mindset was a major key and probably the biggest factor in improving my speech. 3. Fuck people. If they don’t have the patience to wait the extra 5, 10, 15 seconds for you to finish what you’re saying, fuck em. If they look at you crazy while you’re struggling to get a word out, fuck em. The moment with stuttering where you give too many cares to what people think is the day you suffer a setback. Your concern should be on delivering the message to them you are trying to deliver, not how they “feel” about YOU stuttering. Fuck how they feel because there is this thing about feelings….they always change! 4. Work on speaking. Silence is not the key. Look in the mirror and give speeches about whatever is on your mind. Walk around your room and speak out loud. Rehearse conversations out loud. Being silent is not the answer. You have to speak and you have to be diligent about training your voice. There are words and phrases that come easier/harder than others. Practice will help you find those words. Sorry this is long, but I am passionate about speech impediments and people who stutter. You resonate with me especially because I’ve been the smartest, wittiest guy in the room and let my stuttering hold me back from expressing myself. Looking back I missed out on a lot. I hope you find the confidence to keep moving my friend!