Suicidal thought about stuttering

Suicidal thought about stuttering Does anyone else have/had suicidal thought because you just can’t handle the stuttering anymore? My suicidal thought have gotten so bad that I don’t even trust myself to be by a open window that is higher than the second floor or go anywhere near a car or cliff because I am afraid something will just kick in me and make me jump I am getting desperate and I don’t know why but if I don’t get better I think I will actually be able to take my life in the next 3 years