I feel for you. it is easy to let one bad thing ruin everything and get stuck in a “hopelessness” mindset. You need to do something regularily, maybe start an Apprenticeship or study something at an university. Just to get in touch with others and to keep you occupied. If you can earn some money with that even better. If that is too much right now I would still do something small everyday. For example you could do one speech exercise everyday to deal with your anxiety. Go to the bakery, order a coffee at a coffee shop etc. If even thinking about speech is too much I would just do something like sports regularily. Feeling better about yourself is already a good step, and you will feel better once you do sports more often. If you are brave you could join a speech club. I joined toastmasters for example, that is made for people that want to improve their speech. That was a huge step, since I am the only guy there that stutters and I feel really inferior in speech to the others, but they are all accepting and it help me a lot with my confidence.