This basically applies to me too. Ive always had a pretty bad stutter but ive never felt THAT bad about it and was always comfortable talking about it and everything. But I could feel when I would block and when I could talk fine, the difference was in a worry or fear or anxiety I had. I also think actually not giving a fuck would do a lot to clamp down on this. Im still looking for ways to not only accept my stutter (which I believe I have), but more importantly feel comfortable about it to myself, not to others. As a covert, I must say while I havent been in your shoes, I know a lot of coverts and I can imagine how hard it must me. tbh, most of the completely covert people I know all let it out and share as much as they felt they wanted to. Here's my take, if you're life is pretty good and you're mostly enjoying it, take the steps you need but I dont think there's great honor in pushing yourself beyond your limit and ending up more open but less happy/able. The NSA is a great place to start. Find a local support chapter: http://www.westutter.org/find-an-nsa-meeting-near-you/ Also, our annual conference is coming up in July. Book your hotel now!! it's selling out quick. You can call and get paired with with a roommate too to make it cheaper. If you're not sure about it and dont really know about it, trust me, if you have the means then go. It will be worth it. Im not one to use hyperbole and I dont like exaggerations but I havent met a single person who didnt have a good experience. You'll meet so many people and learn a ton. Workshops in the day, hanging out/activities in the evening. If you're worried about meeting people, then you'll feel stupid after the first day. You'll need to work at not meeting people. I recommend it to all stutterers, especially those who havent been able to share or havent met many other stutterers. I think you'll be glad you did.