Wow, you totally just summed up me 1 year ago. I can totally relate man. I use to sit at home on a Saturday night while my friends were out partying filled with hate and self pity. The turning point for me was when I joined the McGuire programme. It is half speech therapy / half self empowerment course. It was the perfect combination for who I was at the time. Have a look, it might interest you. Regardless, PM me with your Skype details. I would love to have a chat.