I'll be honest, its really hard to break out of this funk on your own. You need to really want it or reach a breaking point or something. I think the best thing you can do to turn this ship around is to try and get help for yourself. The first step is searching. This includes trying to find an NSA group near you: http://www.westutter.org/find-an-nsa-meeting-near-you/ Meeting people who have been where you've been and progressed can really help. Likewise, I would look for professional help. Speech therapy in high school is nothing. I would call your insurance provider and see if you're covered. If you are, I would do some web searches for therapists in your area or contact your local NSA group for recommendations. If there are insurance problems, I would look at local universities as many of them offer some kind of therapy to the public, often as part of a graduate course or something. Those would be good places to start. The main thing (and the tough first step) is to start looking and keep looking.