Anyone else ever feel especially suicidal after a bad stuttering incident?

Anyone else ever feel especially suicidal after a bad stuttering incident? That’s definitely a problem for me. I stutter really bad and I start really getting down on myself, how I’m so fucking pathetic and don’t add anything and how things would just be easier with me gone. What great contributions am I bringing to the world or to any individual for that matter when I can barely even fucking speak? All I do is waste people’s time.